Wardrobe Revamp.

Lately I have been getting cravings to shop... Which would be worse if I had a lot of money, because it would soon be gone and spent on things I really don't NEED... And I've made a deal with myself that I'm no longer allowed to spend my money on things I don't need... Because then I end up like I am now... BROKE. But hey, being broke isn't so bad! If you're desperate enough to have new clothes, like me, it just causes you to get a little creative.

Today I had altered a pair of polka-dot trousers that I bought for a dollar at a local thrift shop... and I decided that while I was feeling inspired, I might as well alter a couple other pieces of clothing that are feeling a bit old and drab...

So I made this! I shortened it into a crop top, cut the back in half, made it a scoop back and button up... I like it so much more than I did before!

I'm starting to work on a couple other items as well, and I think I might design some clothing to make from scratch while I'm on this sewing spree... Hopefully I'll shrink my massive stack of fabric that never seems to stop growing!... If they turn out well, I might post some items to sell!

Hey, that rhymed.

Night Time

So these past couple weeks I've been house-sitting for some friends while they've been on vacation,
and I must admit... I've never really slept alone in a house before.
I knew it would probably be hard, as I've never been so good with the dark.
But I didn't quite expect the dabilitating fear that came over me every time the night came and I was alone... My two weeks here has been an extremely good one by day... I love having my own space, and being able to invite people over and be the hostess for once... But it's been fairly sleepless and, well, pretty terrible by night. This fear of the dark thing is something I've struggled with my entire life, and it seems so silly, when I know that the Lord is with me... When I know that He loves me, and His desire is that no harm would come to me. I KNOW that I'm free from fear in the name of Jesus... I KNOW that through Him I have victory. But knowing it to the point of feeling completely confident in it when the sun goes down and I have nothing but my imagination to keep me company... That's another story. I'm trying... I really am. I pray SO often that this fear would go away, and that my heart would feel secure knowing that the Lord is my Shepard... But it's a constant struggle for me.
I wrote this song at about 4:00 am last night when I couldn't sleep for fear of the dark...



Sitting waiting for the sun

Waiting on the day to come

My heart it longs to rid this fear

Yet here it is year after year...

What do I say, what should I do,

Why can't I put my trust in you?

Your arms of love wait close to me,

But I feel so far from victory.

Salt water wells and fills my eyes,

I lie and wave the hours goodbye.

I sing to You and speak Your name,

But the darkness makes me soul grow faint.

Oh Lord, please come and set me free,

these chains won't loose their grip on me.

The night, it makes you seem so far,

I long to know your Shepard heart. 

The Devil waits to conquer me,

But I know the Lord sings over me… 

Outfit of the Day

Today was just a regular sort of day,

where I did regular sorts of things.
But I liked what I was wearing today, so I thought I'd share it.
Also- That's my bike... I ride it everywhere.

Printed Crop-Top - Forever 21
Leather Belt - Thrifted
Pants - Hand-me-down
Red Shoes - Thrifted
Leather Purse - Vintage
 Silver Ring - Forever 21
Amber Bracelet - Vintage (hiding behind handlebar)

ZOUMI

So... A good friend of mine and I have been running a soup kitchen of sorts, called 'Zoumi', for about 8 months now... It was started by our church (http://www.allistoncf.com/) MANY years ago, and has been taken over by various people throughout the years since...
I used to go to Zoumi back in high school, when one of the guys from our church ran it, and I remember how much I LOVED going...  It was such an awesome thing to be able to walk over at lunch time to this little church down-town, and have a bowl of DELICIOUS (and free) soup while sitting with so many different kinds of people, whom you wouldn't necessarily sit with otherwise.

I think it's so great when people of all different ages fellowship together not as 'leaders' and 'youth' or 'teachers' and 'students'... Just as people, hanging out while eating good food. You don't see that so often any more, and I think it's a really good thing... And more important than it's made out to be. So often nowadays, young people don't even know how to talk to older people, and vice versa... Which is sad, really. Because there's so much to learn from different generations. I'm only 20, and I admit, I'm already not the best at talking to pre-teens and teenagers... You don't realize how quickly you change, and how quickly you forget what it's like to be where they are until you're sitting at a table of 14 year old girls, trying to keep up with conversations about boys and sleepovers... It was a little bit daunting the first couple of days, but quickly it became normal, comfortable and fun...
I'm sort of sad I won't be seeing those kids twice a week any more, laughing at their silliness and getting to know their hearts. I'll miss them.

And then there are some people older than me who would come in, who sometimes were a little bit of the 'interesting' sort... And at first, that was even more daunting than the table of teenagers. But that, too, soon became normal. Not always comfortable or fun... But normal. And some people who would come in would really test your patience... Asking for things that weren't really necessary, not eating any of their food, being slightly obnoxious, or coming in RIGHT before we were planning on ending for the day. But those people, too, became less frustrating over time, and eventually I even had some good talks and laughs with them... And I never thought I'd say this, but I think I'll miss them, too. Maybe not a lot, but in a certain kind of way.

I think if there's one thing I took away from Zoumi that I wasn't so great at before, it's the ability to have a conversation with nearly every kind of person.
Not necessarily a comfortable conversation, but a fairly smooth one... Also the ability to make food in extremely large quantities, which I have a feeling will be a useful skill to have later on in life. And I think I'm a little bit more conscious of the fact that every person is the way they are for a reason, so judging people is probably not a very good idea... Nothing comes from nothing, so if someone is a little bit difficult to be around, they've probably had a bit of a difficult life... So even when you might not feel like it, you treat them with love and kindness. And you remember them, their face, their name, and the things they struggle with, and you pray for them, because even if you don't have much power to change the difficult things going on in their life and their heart... You can still pray... And prayer is a mighty and powerful thing.

Mark 11:24  Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

Little Diddy

Lead me,
Lead me, I will follow.
Go before me,
with you I'll never falter.

Help me not to stray
to the right or to the left,
I want my every single step
to be towards you.

Lead me,
Lead me, I will follow.

Rant On Social Networking

I'll be the first to admit it... I'm a little bit addicted to YouTube vlogs.
Vlogs being the video equivalent to a regular written blog (for those of you who didn't know)... And after watching an extremely large amount of these videos over the years, I have come to the conclusion, that people are weird. Seriously... I'm not sure that people were meant to be able to expose themselves in the way that some now so easily do via the internet. Because clearly, there are some things that people say and do, that they would not be so anxious to do or say in real life... When speaking to a camera, or typing on a screen, there isn't that immediate reaction from a person opposite you that gives you hints as to whether or not what you're saying is acceptable... And that's a little bit scary. With the internet, it is now straight from thought to OUT for the world to see... No filters, no social cues, nothing but the mind of the person who's posting the material... And much of the time, people's minds are WEIRD.

I know from my own experience, that I have said things through MSN, email, facebook messages, HONESTY BOX(<-- worst invention ever), that I would NOT say in real life. Whether it be telling a boy on a whim that I "like" him, lashing out at someone for a rumour that I'd heard, or posting a gushy poem that I'd written about my "feelings" for the world to see... As you probably could have guessed, most of this was done during highschool. I think probably ALL of the drama I was ever involved in during highschool was fuelled by the internet, and a large portion of the emotional turmoil I went through as a teenager was made worse by the internet. If I could go back in time, I would have waited until my hormones had settled down and arranged themselves in a more regular manner before I signed up for facebook, myspace or any other social networking site... They are nothing but trouble when mixed with teenage angst... A fact proven true by the numerous and ever growing accounts of severe cyber bullying which often turn into much bigger issues such as eating disorders, depression, suicide, etc. It's a lot easier to pick on someone when you don't have to see the hurt on the victims face while you wound them emotionally with nasty comments about looks or awkwardness...

I'm glad I was never involved in any extreme cases when it comes to cyber bullying or harassment. Because honestly, after reading some articles about things that have happened to young girls after posting videos and pictures of themselves on social networking sites ... I feel pretty blessed to have come through my teens in the age of social networking with nothing more than a few embarrassing messages and posts. Those are things that are quickly forgotten by others, even if not by yourself. But sometimes, people aren't so fortunate. So I guess, moral of the story... If you're a teenager, or anybody else for that matter, watch what you post! Don't compromise your "real life filter" for an "online filter". Don't post pictures of yourself wearing something you wouldn't comfortably wear out on a daily basis. Think about the kind of person you'd like the people you respect to see you as, and don't stray from that standard... Better yet, think about the kind of person you think God created you to be, and don't stray from THAT standard!





I had no idea where this was going when I started typing... I just wanted to type. But there you have it! A rant on the dangers of social networking as a teenager.

Werd.

Finger Puppets

I make finger puppets sometimes... And when I do, I will be uploading pictures of them for you to see, and if you like them, you can buy them from me. At the moment, these ones are for sale! They are $35.00 for the set of four. Comment if you're interested!...They are original designs, hand-sewn, made from felt and vintage cotton fabric. Suitable for ages 4 and up.